


It's about

by emda



Category: DBSK | Tohoshinki | TVfXQ | TVXQ
Genre: Angst, M/M, exchangefic, oldfic, repost
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-07
Updated: 2017-01-07
Packaged: 2018-09-15 13:45:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 975
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9237647
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emda/pseuds/emda
Summary: It's not about breaking up, is about seeing you fall...knowing that I couldn't reach out for you.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This a repost from a old fic (posted in LJ 2008/03/30). Expect super amateur writing.  
> Yunchun timeline Exchange  
> Timeline: Past- September 2000  
> Beta Reader: Milena

He grabs his bags out of the taxi trunk quickly, trying not to get wet under the heavy rain. He pays the driver and strolls into the airport. Some day this is for running away. All of the flights have either been cancelled or postponed; the best time to find a ticket is to probably try and grab one from someone who hasn't shown up because of the weather. But, just being in the airport and paying for the ticket is truly a sign that there is no turning back. He goes through the security checkpoint and walks straight to the designated gate. Once he reaches the gate and sits on one of the red comfy cold chairs at the right side of the gate, he looks through the window at the still pouring rain.

I sit on the left side of the gate, looking directly at him. He's soaking wet, like me. After he broke up with me under the thick rain he ran here to escape from me… or maybe from himself. From where I sit, I can see the hunted expression on his face and the absence of light in his eyes. He frowns, then lets a heavy sigh escape from is lips. I can tell because his shoulders go up and then down abruptly as he closes his eyes.

 

_The rain was falling hard over both of us. The wind was whistling silently through the dark night making the rain drops colder. Drenching us. God was marvelous for allowing the rain to fall, covering me with his salty tears. My sight became a little blurry because of the rain, my tears and the deep pain he was inflicting to my heart. But I could see he was moving his lips. In my head his voice was RINGING annoyingly ‘I don’t wanna be with you,’ ‘I never wanted to be with you,’ ‘This was just a bet.’ I felt a hole in my stomach up to my chest. I felt so broken, so hurt… so dead. It wasn't just about breaking up, about feeling like I was nothing to him in an instant. It hurt more to see that his eyes were giving him away. That it was like everything he was trying so hard to make me believe, he was trying to believe himself.  
His masculine frame, his sharp jaw line, his broad chest, his long legs were trembling. It could be because it was a cold and dark rainy night, or his willpower to free me from him was fighting over his feelings for me._

_“It's the best if we stop seeing each other, Yoochun. We weren’t going to last forever… you and I were never meant to be forever. I’m not the guy for you and you certainly aren’t the guy for me.” With that, he turned on his heel and walked away from me._

 

I follow Yunho to the airport and buy the same ticket he bought. All this and I couldn’t shrug the feeling that everything he said on the rain was bullshit. That he was lying and, he was a bad liar. If he didn’t feel anything for me why did his eyes look so shallow? Why his lips looks like they had never formed a smile before? Why did he look so old in just a couple of hours? Why did the light I saw the year we were together fade with the wind and the rain? Why did he suddenly seem so tiny? Why, when he used to stand so strong, has he curled into himself?

Seeing this, my heart twisted, and I almost gasped for air. He was falling apart the second he broke up with me. I felt so useless, like I really was nobody. I don’t know what to do and I can’t do anything about it. I can’t fix this.

They call the passengers and he stands slowly, gripping the arms of the chair hard. He walks carefully to the gate entrance and almost trips over someone else's bag. His face is as white as a ghost's and his gaze far away, lost in sadder memories than just this farewell, where he has no one to say goodbye to. He passes the gate and walks toward the airplane, but, halfway through the hallway, his knees give out, and he falls to the floor. I stand up quickly and see as a young woman and an airport employee stop to help him stand up and reach his seat inside the airplane.

I walk to the exact seat he sat on minutes ago, and stare at the airplane through the glass window. I touch the fabric of the chair where he was, and then I sit on it. The rain is still falling but not as heavily as before; it is more like thin raindrops falling lazily on the ground, wetting everything. The sky was still dark and the wind was cold or maybe it was the airport. I look at my reflection on the glass window: tears are falling from my eyes. Seeing him like that, the last image I will have of him, is unbearable. I stare down at my hands. I couldn’t do anything for him. Not a sweet caress, nor a comforting hug, a soft touch on his face. I couldn’t be there to assure him everything would be okay. I saw him falling and I couldn’t reach out to help him.

Normal people would say that breaking up is the saddest thing in the world. But if normal people saw what I just saw, that thought would change. In the end, it's not about breaking up, it’s about seeing you fall. In the end we were never a normal couple. In the end, forever wasn’t meant for us. It's about you falling… and I couldn’t reach you.


End file.
